Thursday, November 11, 2010

11.11.2010

Its easy to stoop, to be blatant and crass. Sometimes I feel trying to be right all the time is an onerous task. Its starkingly surprising how easy it is for a person to distrust, to hate, to criticize another.

Even though this blog is a place close to my heart, I have always tried to distance my personal life from it, since it is nobody's business. But there is so much to say at times, and its such an easy vent; hence, please forgive my outburst.

Everytime that I face a situation like this, a little something inside me breaks. I do not shy away from accepting that I still have that perfect-world picture in my head, I still believe in the basic goodness in every human being and I still start out by trusting people and making friends. But occasionally, my fairyland turns into a fierce, ugly battleground where no one is no one's friend. I am not perfect either. But I know what I am not. I never trample over someone to prove something. I never hate someone to the extreme of harming him/her. I might wish to at times, but I have never done that. I am not a hard worker but I try to be one. I try to learn, explore, question, but not at the cost of my basic principles of honesty and helpfulness. Beyond this, I really don't care what you think of me. I'm proud of the fact that I accept and acknowledge my mistakes and I think it takes a lot of courage to do that, as much as it takes to point someone else's mistakes to them and not talk about them behind their backs. This is and probably will be the most direct post I've ever written but I wanted the message to go across. I know in a few minutes, I will go back to being in love with the world, but right now, it stinks!